SACK THE DIRECTOR AND STYLIST

Does anyone remember the chubby Cleopatra girls? Remember those three sisters with long braids in ponytails jumping on their beds while they threatened “….Cleopatra’s comin’ atcha….”.
They were the energetic Birmingham based girl group who were rumoured to have being signed to Madonna’s Maverick Label. The group consisted of Cleo the lead singer and her backing singers/dancers older sisters. They had a string of hits from their debut album including their debut single `'Cleopatra's Theme', 'Life Ain't Easy', and 'I Wan't You Back'. They were nominated for a BRIT Award and MOBO Awards. Word also has it that they sold over 300,000 copies of their debut album in the U.S of A.

For a second we thought they were going to mimic the success of the Olsen twins when the signed up to Littlewoods to design their own range of bright and funky clothing and became the first Black British band to have ever featured in their own Covergirl advertisement. Then, like a ghost, they vanished!

Well, last night, in the confides of my home I was forced to pay attention to a music video playing on one of the many brain-rotting music channels on Sky. There was a newly grown-up Cleo (notably the ONLY talented one) rolling and raising her weave back and forth - beyonce style as she winked and teased (well tried to tease me!), she belted out a pretty forgettable new single ‘Feelin’ Like This’. Now we give her kudos for effort, however we couldn’t get past thinking this is a bad bad bad immitation of Amerie’s 1-thing chereography matched with the shimmering-silver mini dresses – oh yes! She did go there.

On the plus side, the song showcases Cleo’s unique and strong vocal ability. Cleo has confirmed, “It’s a song about the dating game. It’s about the feeling of being head over heels for someone but they are not yours yet.” “Feelin’ Like This” is the first single from Cleo’s forth-coming debut solo album and is produced by top producer Marco Rakascan. We wish her luck but I really wish someone could bitch-slap both the director and the stylist for doing an inane imitation of sexy. The last criminals were Mis-teeq, we can't give any more excuses, it's 2007.

Shame on you!

DON'T HATE, IT'S BRIT!

http://video.yahoo.com/video/play?vid=1119416166&fr=yvmtf

Okay, so we are endorsing the new Ms Spears single as this year’s SexyBack. I was at a bar last night and when this song came on, a rabble of Chinese ladies went wild to the floor (get low-style!) as they begged us to …..

It’s hot and it’s Britney B*****!

DON'T THROW STONES

A round of applause for Ian Brown; the once relevant front man of the Stone Roses for his random remarks during yesterday’s Q Awards. Besides our shock at the fact he was awarded a ‘Legend’ award. We were even more flabbergasted by his hypocritical remark at the event’s Best Album winner, Amy Winehouse. His blatantly cheap dig at Amy’s widely reported drink problem was a comical and duplicitous slander considering this is the same man famous for his "I saw more drugs in a couple of months in Strangeways than in the whole of the rest of my lifetime" comment.

Mr Brown is no stranger to the law. In 1998, he was sentenced to 4 months in jail for air rage, after threatening a stewardess with airmeal plastic cutlery, offering to cut her hands off on a flight. Not to mention his assault charges during a San fransciso gig in 2005 and we can go on. In less than a decade, he had released five albums including Unfinished Monkey Business (1998), Golden Greats (1999), Music of the Spheres (2001), Solarized (2004); The World is yours (2007). Just in case you’re worried you haven’t heard of any of these ‘critically-acclaimed’ albums – don’t worry, you’re not alone!

We recommend that Ian Brown keeps his tongue in his month.