A word of advise to Owen Wilson, don’t take that woman back. If you attempted suicide over a woman you should never never and we mean (let’s say it together) never take her back, if you managed to survive the ordeal that is.
Rumour has it, Kate Hudson recently split with boyfriend Dax Shepard because “she wanted to spend time together with her son”. WHATEVEEER!
We like Owen Wilson at Rennaissance Man, the man is a living legend and we were all very upset to see a grown man reduced to nothing because of the four-letter word. Our advice to Owen is a) get better, b) get a new haircut, c) shave more often, d) party with Scarlett Johansson (she’s way hotter than kate anyways plus we think she’s single) and e) never let Kate in the same building as you (at least for the first 3 months). Otherwise, she’ll sneak up on you and voila you will find yourself in a ‘SYMPATHY RELATIONSHIP’.
Now, sympathy dating is cool when you’re broke and height-challenged but it’s just plain ridiculous if you’re a Hollywood actor. No way jose!
I’m going to have to quote Uncle Chris again: “Fellas, do you ever catch your woman just looking at you? She’s looking at you cause you ain’t her first choice…”
Nuff said!
PR MAN OF THE CENTURY
Every time Al Gore comes on TV, I just can’t seem to control my urge to chant Go Al, Go Al, Go Al! The man is remarkable. He lost the Presidential election by default, found a global issue to tag himself to, made a movie, won an Oscar and now he’s managed to win The Nobel Peace Prize "for their efforts to build up and disseminate greater knowledge about man-made climate change, and to lay the foundations for the measures that are needed to counteract such change".
All hail Al!!
Mr. Gore was one of the first politicians to grasp the seriousness of climate change and to call for a reduction in emissions of carbon dioxide and other greenhouses gases. Sadly, a current survey revealed that a significant segment of Americans though aware that Mr Gore won The Nobel Peace Prize were unclear as to why he actually won it.
The Nobel Peace Prize has sparked controversy throughout its history. The Norwegian Parliament appoints the Peace Prize Committee, but pacifist critics argue that the same Parliament has pursued partisan military aims by ratifying membership in NATO in 1949, by hosting NATO troops, and by leasing ports and territorial waters to US ballistic missile submarines in 1983. However, the Parliament has no say in the award issue. Past winners have included Martin Luther King (1964 laureate), Jimmy Carter (2002 laureate), The 14th Dalai Lama (1989 laureate), and Kofi Annan (2001 laureate) amongst many. On closer inspection, the peace-laureates often have a lifetime's history of working at and promoting humanitarian issues.
We applaud Al Gore for his relentless quest for relevance. This is a man whom was publicily robbed for the U.S presidency seat yet eight years later, he is awarded what is arguably the most prestigious accolade to any man. The man is his own PR Machine and we love him for it.
Memorably, Gore gave a brief speech at this year’s Academy Awards ceremony after the Inconvienent Truth won ‘Documentary Feature’: "My fellow Americans, people all over the world, we need to solve the climate crisis. It's not a political issue; it's a moral issue. We have everything we need to get started, with the possible exception of the will to act.
Go Al! We need a female Al Gore with a Hermes Birkin of course!
All hail Al!!
Mr. Gore was one of the first politicians to grasp the seriousness of climate change and to call for a reduction in emissions of carbon dioxide and other greenhouses gases. Sadly, a current survey revealed that a significant segment of Americans though aware that Mr Gore won The Nobel Peace Prize were unclear as to why he actually won it.
The Nobel Peace Prize has sparked controversy throughout its history. The Norwegian Parliament appoints the Peace Prize Committee, but pacifist critics argue that the same Parliament has pursued partisan military aims by ratifying membership in NATO in 1949, by hosting NATO troops, and by leasing ports and territorial waters to US ballistic missile submarines in 1983. However, the Parliament has no say in the award issue. Past winners have included Martin Luther King (1964 laureate), Jimmy Carter (2002 laureate), The 14th Dalai Lama (1989 laureate), and Kofi Annan (2001 laureate) amongst many. On closer inspection, the peace-laureates often have a lifetime's history of working at and promoting humanitarian issues.
We applaud Al Gore for his relentless quest for relevance. This is a man whom was publicily robbed for the U.S presidency seat yet eight years later, he is awarded what is arguably the most prestigious accolade to any man. The man is his own PR Machine and we love him for it.
Memorably, Gore gave a brief speech at this year’s Academy Awards ceremony after the Inconvienent Truth won ‘Documentary Feature’: "My fellow Americans, people all over the world, we need to solve the climate crisis. It's not a political issue; it's a moral issue. We have everything we need to get started, with the possible exception of the will to act.
Go Al! We need a female Al Gore with a Hermes Birkin of course!
DID YOU OWN A PAIR?
I hate to do this but if you were 18 around the mid nineties - this might hurt.
Did you ever own a pair of these? Did you religiously wear this non-stop during the summer, winter and autumn months although they were battered and clearly needed changing? Did you save up to buy a pair to fit in with your respective 'ethic' peer groups? Did soemone ever step on your precious pair and the only thing that crossed your mind was a brutal assault on their face?
If any of this sounds familiar, you are guilty without a chance of parole.
MISS JONES
She's married to Nasiru Oludara. Again, she's married to Nasiru Oludara. Again, she's married to Nasiru Oludara.
Sorry, I just have to constantly remind myself of this fact!
MUST SEE TV - NOT!
MTV has a new reality show. Yay! It’s titled LIVING ON THE EDGE
Just in case you don’t know MTVONE (whatever that means) don’t actually play any videos these days, its full of reality shows. Hogan Knows Best, Real World Denver, I love New York (my personal favourite, that woman is definitely U-G-L-Y you ain’t got no alibi) and The Hills (Oohhhh, I love those slags – they are DRAMA – they need inspirational sessions with Ms Mary J Blige)
Now, we all know the UK will try on almost any level to rival their ‘close’ allies. The MTV Europe production team spent all summer shooting a bunch of rich Cheshire kids who have just completed sixth form and are getting ready for the BIG U word.
Excited yet! Ooh yes, so I watched as the ultimate MTV junkie – life isn’t the same without knowing the new stupid-blond chick on the block. After 10 minutes, it was clear I was going to hate this show and it’s lead character, Esme. Yes, Esme!
She’s 18, rude, self-obsessed, slightly lumpy and generally vile.
After 2 opening episodes, it was clear these kids JUST AIN'T FUCKED UP ENOUGH; we watched them play tennis, drink lattes and still no drama. I have concluded that English people just can’t do glamorous nor ditsy, that’s for our Americans to do and they do it well. I will watch the next episode, just to see if they get their acts together and I shall keep you all posted. In the meantime, don’t bother to tune in, that’s my job.
Ooh, anorexia could be a good ‘planted’ plot for Esme. Ooh, you disgusting!!
Just in case you don’t know MTVONE (whatever that means) don’t actually play any videos these days, its full of reality shows. Hogan Knows Best, Real World Denver, I love New York (my personal favourite, that woman is definitely U-G-L-Y you ain’t got no alibi) and The Hills (Oohhhh, I love those slags – they are DRAMA – they need inspirational sessions with Ms Mary J Blige)
Now, we all know the UK will try on almost any level to rival their ‘close’ allies. The MTV Europe production team spent all summer shooting a bunch of rich Cheshire kids who have just completed sixth form and are getting ready for the BIG U word.
Excited yet! Ooh yes, so I watched as the ultimate MTV junkie – life isn’t the same without knowing the new stupid-blond chick on the block. After 10 minutes, it was clear I was going to hate this show and it’s lead character, Esme. Yes, Esme!
She’s 18, rude, self-obsessed, slightly lumpy and generally vile.
After 2 opening episodes, it was clear these kids JUST AIN'T FUCKED UP ENOUGH; we watched them play tennis, drink lattes and still no drama. I have concluded that English people just can’t do glamorous nor ditsy, that’s for our Americans to do and they do it well. I will watch the next episode, just to see if they get their acts together and I shall keep you all posted. In the meantime, don’t bother to tune in, that’s my job.
Ooh, anorexia could be a good ‘planted’ plot for Esme. Ooh, you disgusting!!
MARIO: MY MAMA LOVES YE-YO!
People,
If you had a parent whom was dependent on a class A-substance would you tell? Better yet, would you announce it to the entire MTV generation? Mario revealed this disastrous PR stunt on an MTV special. My jaw dropped last night as I watched Mr. Let-me-love-you speak so dismissively about his mother's growing addiction. I certainly hope this isn't a stunt to pull attention away from rival, Chris Brown cause we all know he's kicking your ass right now.
If you had a parent whom was dependent on a class A-substance would you tell? Better yet, would you announce it to the entire MTV generation? Mario revealed this disastrous PR stunt on an MTV special. My jaw dropped last night as I watched Mr. Let-me-love-you speak so dismissively about his mother's growing addiction. I certainly hope this isn't a stunt to pull attention away from rival, Chris Brown cause we all know he's kicking your ass right now.
BIG SHIT STOPPIN', LITTLE SHIT POPPIN
A letter to T.I
Why oh why didn't you stick to your original prophesy? Why the hell on the eve of a big awards' night will you be found fighting at a strip club? Why will you ask your bodyguard to order your machine guns? And why why why, are you married to short'est' from X-SCAPE?
Unlike your music, a lot of things do not make sense about your journey. If this is a stint to sell records then we ain't laughing as the judge has smacked the smile off our smog faces with a 'no bond' which means we ain't hearing your 'swag' in a minute.
Step up and read some books!
Renaissance Man
Why oh why didn't you stick to your original prophesy? Why the hell on the eve of a big awards' night will you be found fighting at a strip club? Why will you ask your bodyguard to order your machine guns? And why why why, are you married to short'est' from X-SCAPE?
Unlike your music, a lot of things do not make sense about your journey. If this is a stint to sell records then we ain't laughing as the judge has smacked the smile off our smog faces with a 'no bond' which means we ain't hearing your 'swag' in a minute.
Step up and read some books!
Renaissance Man
BADGE OF HONOUR: VERSE OF THE DAY
Adele - Daydreamer from her upcoming album 19.
"Daydreamer, sittin’ on the seat
Soaking up the sun he is a
Real lover, makin’ up the past and feeling up his girl like he’s never felt her figure before
Her joy (..?)
Looks good when he when he walks, he is the subject of their talk
He would be hard to chase, but good to catch and he could change the world with his hands behind his back,
Oh…
You can find him sittin’ on your doorstep
Waiting for the surprise
It will feel like he’s been there for hours
And you can tell that he’ll be there for life"
NOTHING BUT LOVE FOR MADONNA BUT C'MON....
It's probably stale news amongst you music connoisseurs but I can't seem to wrap my head around this groundbreaking deal. As you all know 49-year old Madonna (Icon, Mother, Novelist, Actress,.....) has been the most consistent woman in the Music industry for over 3 decades. She has dazzled, shocked, evolved blah blah blah but does she a $120m deal with Live Nation? She's great but can't the younger talents (Alicia, Beyonce, Kate Nash, KT Turnstall, even Amy,etc.) be given this opportunity?
The question is: Does Madonna really need to be stricking these deals? The 49-year-old pop singer sold about 20 million copies worldwide of her last three studio albums, according to sources. Her last album, "Confessions on a Dance Floor" (2005), sold 1.6 million units in the United States, according to Nielsen SoundScan, and sold 7 million units worldwide. What more do you need at a ripe age of 49. It just doesn't make any sense. I'm going to have to quote Chris Rock to best deal with this issue:
"You can't just whip out a 40 year old titty that's your man's titty. That is your man's titty 40 year old titty your man's titty. 20 year old titty community titty. That's for all to see."
Nuff said!
WARNING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ok, his name is David Jordan - he wears tight jeans, rocks spiky relaxed-hair, sings with his high-pitched voice and just has a disturbing presence.
Now, everyone knows I'm into my alternative music but I'm frightened that his record company has tried to model his genre on Lenny Kravitz.
The record is on release later this month. Just say NO!
BADGE OF HONOUR - VERSE OF THE DAY
UGK ft. Outkast - International Players' Anthem (I Choose you)
Andre 3000's verse -
"So, I typed a text to a girl I used to see
Sayin that I chose this cutie pie with whom I wanna be
And I apologize if this message gets you down
Then I CC'd every girl that I'd see see round town and
I hate to see y'all frown but I'd rather see her smiling
Wetness all around me, true, but I'm no islandPeninsula maybe, makes no sense I know, crazy
Give up all this pussy cat thats in my lap no lookin back
Spaceships dont come equipped with rearview mirrors
They dip as quick as they can
The atmosphere is now ripped
Im so like a Pip, Im glad its night
So the light from the sun would not burn me on my bum
When I shoot the moon high, jump the broom
Like a premie out the womb
My partner yellin "Too soon! Dont do it! Reconsider!Read some litera - ture on the subject
You sure? Fuck itY
ou know we got your back like chiroprac - tic
If that bitch do you dirty we'll wipe her ass out as in detergent"
CHECK OUT THE VIDEO - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjPFz5r8Gfo
Andre 3000's verse -
"So, I typed a text to a girl I used to see
Sayin that I chose this cutie pie with whom I wanna be
And I apologize if this message gets you down
Then I CC'd every girl that I'd see see round town and
I hate to see y'all frown but I'd rather see her smiling
Wetness all around me, true, but I'm no islandPeninsula maybe, makes no sense I know, crazy
Give up all this pussy cat thats in my lap no lookin back
Spaceships dont come equipped with rearview mirrors
They dip as quick as they can
The atmosphere is now ripped
Im so like a Pip, Im glad its night
So the light from the sun would not burn me on my bum
When I shoot the moon high, jump the broom
Like a premie out the womb
My partner yellin "Too soon! Dont do it! Reconsider!Read some litera - ture on the subject
You sure? Fuck itY
ou know we got your back like chiroprac - tic
If that bitch do you dirty we'll wipe her ass out as in detergent"
CHECK OUT THE VIDEO - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BjPFz5r8Gfo
THERE'S ONLY ONE AMY
Amy is rumored to be a potential front runner at next years' grammy awards. She's tipped to be nominated for 8 gongs for her brilliant 'Back to Black' album.
They can try to tarnish her talent but the girl is certainly riding high. No Pun intended!
GROWN MEN'S HEROES
Now, I disagree with the concept of only young people need role models. I strongly believe that as you get older, you should admire and mimic certain work ethic, drive and ambition.
My heroes are Roger Federer and Tiger Woods.
Great men, great accomplishments, great work ethics, great principles....should I go on. I will celebrate these men as often as possible. They have left their mark, it's time for us to leave ours - whatever it is.
WE PREFER THE OLD CRAIG....
I saw the new Craig David video for his new single 'Hot Stuff' this morning. Sadly, the song ain't so hot and Craig needs to lay off those steroids. The man has no neck any more. It's like his head is trying to break out of the body.
The song is pretty forgetful although I'm sure by the times the radio leeches get their claws on it, we probably be all humming to it. It's also got a sample of the very familiar 'Let's Dance' by David Bowie recently sampled by Puff Daddy ft. Mase 'Been around the World'
What ever happened to the simplicity of 'Seven days', 'Fill me in' and 'Walking away'?I'm not a music critic but surely the A&R guys at his record label understand this. Everyone is always looking for the 'a new sound', it's all bollocks at the end of the day if one can do something well, get better at doing just that.
TRAGEDY
It brings great discomfort whenever I think of this image and the trails and tribulations of this fallen star. We all recall her remarkable achievements at the 2000 Olympics. We all celebrated her many triumphs, just to think all of that has been rubbished by her admitting to using performance-enhancing drugs. She's handed over all her Olympic medals and winnings.
What she gon' do now? What exactly can she do?
This is just TRAGIC!
TOM FORD - WE SALUTE!
We are big fans of Tom Ford. The one time head of the Gucci Group.
We are big fans of his sunglasses line - perhaps because we can't afford anything else in his LA flagship store.
ALICIA KING
Alicia Keys is Back. Alicia Keys is Back.
No One is on repeat on my MP3. I have read many interviews with the lady in many publications and my conclusion is - she's royalty.
We bow at your talent, your grace, your gift and your approach to your work.
PLASTIC COUPLE OF THE BLACK RACE
They've come a long way. My niece asked if she could have this for Christmas. My response was ..............................
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