Like every other person in Britain, I have been gripped by the irregularities of the "Canoe" Man and his wife. His wife finally returned to the UK two days ago, only to be escorted off the aircraft by armed policemen.

So let's rewind back to last week, when an "amnesia" suffering "canoe" man walked into a police station claiming absolutely no recollection of the past 5 years.

STOP......what the f***? I don't think he suffered amnesia, I think he's suffering from a bad dose of insanity. This man faked his own death and conspired with his wife to claim insurance worth over £400, 000 whilst agreeing to continue living his life as normal (except keeping his children in the dark)

I'm sorry, but this is f***ed up and what makes it all more anal is the fact that this is just another middle-aged couple in Britain scamming their way through the system.

The question now is why did he turn himself in? Well after extensive telephone conversations - the general census is as follows, something went horribly wrong. THE MOST LOGICAL, his wife started to wear the trousers as she had the money and he couldn't take it anyone as it wasn't what he had bargained for.

Interesting isn't it that he turned himself in without his wife's consent and while she was in Atlanta, USA.

All this hoop-la in the press makes me worry about the McCains. Does anyone still care about dear Madeline?